After a winter storm left us without power for three days, I vowed to buy a backup generator, to guard against future events. My local hardware store carried a 10,000 Watt gasoline-powered generator for $3,000.
The T. A. Edison Conventional Gas Master 10000 seemed reliable and convenient but looked kind of old-fashioned. So I took a brochure and researched alternatives.
On the Internet I found a new generator called the “Sarver-Schauer Super Green Eco 10000.” The website described it in glowing terms and said it cost the same as the Edison Gas Master for the same 10,000 watts of electrical generating capacity. Plus, it was available at the Michigan Energy Office.
I leapt for joy! For the same price, I could get a modern looking, environment-friendly model directly from my state government! I raced to the MEO warehouse in Lansing, plopped down a check, popped the unit into my Prius, and drove home at a very reasonable rate of speed. I assembled the device and hired a licensed and insured master electrician to help me connect it to my household circuits.
Then I waited for the first power outage, knowing I was Boy Scout prepared.
Finally, it hit! The winter storm to end all storms! With a tremendous crash, a giant tree limb brought down the power lines that fed the entire neighborhood. I had a smug grin, as I waited for the Super Green Eco 10000 to spring into action, sparing my family days of cold and misery. And I waited. And waited.
Nothing. No power. No lights. No heat. No stove. No TV.
Furious, I pulled out the owner’s manual and flipped to the troubleshooting page. In the section titled “My Sarver-Schauer Super Green Eco 10000 is not producing power,” I read: “Is your SSSGE plugged into a reliable electrical supply? The SSSGE cannot start on its own. It must be connected to a conventional power supply of 10,000 Watts rated output to function. Connect unit and try again.”
Desperate (and agitated), I asked my neighbor if I could plug my Eco 10000 into his natural gas-fired generator for a few minutes, to start it. After he stopped rolling on the floor in laughter, he ran a power cord from his generator to my SSSGE. I flipped the switch, waiting for redemption.
Nothing. No heat. No lights. No cooktop. Nothing.
Furious, I grabbed my manual again and read the section, “I have attached my SSSGE10K to a reliable generator and it still will not run.”It said “If your SSSGE10K is attached to reliable power yet still is not working properly, you may have no fuel. Your SSSGE10K must have fuel to operate.”
Fuel? I didn’t even see a fuel tank. Where do I get fuel, and where do I put it? Reading further, I found the 800 number and called customer service – in Europe. After a twenty-minute wait, a technician answered and asked in a thick Scandinavian accent, “How can I help you?”
“I bought an eco-friendly SSSGE10K,” I explained, “and now, just when I need it the most, I cannot get the thing to run. Where do I get fuel?”
“Just a minute, sir, while I access the SSSGE10K database,” she said. “Oh yes, right here. That model is powered by wind. I am afraid you cannot procure this fuel yourself. You must wait patiently for the fuel to arrive. Of course, we cannot guarantee that it will arrive in sufficient quantities to satisfy your needs on any given day. But in your region, on an annualized basis, it will produce around 30% of its maximum rated capacity. The good news is that, when the fuel does show up, it’s free! Isn’t that wonderful?”
I slammed the receiver down and thought, “This must be a joke. Who would dream up some sort of crazy backup generator that has to be plugged into another generator to even start – and then operates only when the ‘fuel’ shows up on a time-plus-luck basis? What are you supposed to do when it’s 20-below-zero, like it is now, and there is no cussed wind? And who in their right mind would claim the SSSGE10K is of equal value to the Edison Gas Master – or of any value at all during a power outage!?”
As I threw the manual down, I looked at the back cover, and everything became clear. It said: “The Sarver-Schauer Super Green Eco 10000 is the result of a joint venture involving Enron’s Ken Lay, former Michigan Energy Office director John Sarver, Michigan Energy/Michigan Jobs chief Mark Schauer, the Sierra Club, the United States Department of Energy and the taxpayer-funded Stimulus Program.”
Maybe that’s what President Obama meant when he said the government “helped you build that.”
Kevon Martis is director of the Interstate Informed Citizens Coalition (www.iiccusa.org).
Postscript. This little fable fails the credibility test – and it should, because it is totally fictional, a poor attempt to emulate Mark Twain’s humor. There is no such thing as a SSSG Eco 10000 generator. However, equally ludicrous, as the Wall Street Journal notes, in 2010 wind energy technologies received $5 billion in federal (taxpayer) subsidies, or $56.29 per megawatt-hour of electricity actually generated, and photovoltaic solar power received $968 million or $775.64 per mWh of actual electricity – while reliable natural gas-generated electricity received a paltry 64 cents per mWh.
If you’re still in the renewable energy camp, perhaps this very real Consumer Reports review will make you realize how absurd many “green” energy claims actually are. Caveat emptor: Let the buyer beware!
The Honeywell WT6500 (made by WindTronics) is one of the few wind turbines that can be mounted on a roof. As with much larger turbines, any excess electricity can be sold to a utility company for credit on your power bill. It supposedly starts generating electricity at lower wind speeds than traditional turbines. WindTronics says its units start spinning when winds are just a half mile per hour, and electricity is generated at only 3 mph. Giant industrial wind turbines, by comparison, require at least 7.5 mph winds.
The WindTronics website offered a tool that let Consumer Reports calculate that it would get 1,155 kWh of electricity per year at the 12-mph average it predicted for the magazine’s area of Yonkers, New York. The authorized installer did not suggest that wind conditions on the CR headquarters roof might generate less than that, even though the predicted rating was for a height of 164 feet, much higher than the 33 feet that WindTronics requires for rooftop installations.
In the 15 months since the turbine was installed, though, it has delivered less than 4 kWh [total electricity] – enough only to power a 12,000 btu window air conditioner for one afternoon. A company representative in charge of installations worldwide recently visited our offices and confirmed that our test model was correctly installed. What’s more, he told us that while the WT6500 should start generating power at about 3 mph, the initial juice goes just to power the system’s inverter, which must be running before it supplies any AC power elsewhere. The true wind speed needed to start producing AC while the inverter is [operating] is 6 mph, not far from the 7.5 mph needed by a traditional gearbox wind turbine.
The Honeywell costs $11,000 installed, comes with a five-year warranty and has a 20-year expected product life…. [However, at] the rate the WT6500 is delivering power at our test site, it would take several millennia for the product to pay for itself in savings – not the 56 years it would take even with the 1,155 kWh quote we received.
Source: “Recouping cost of wind turbine may take more than a lifetime,” by Ed Perratore, Consumer Reports, August 6, 2012.